I used to be so much more adventurous than I am now. I have driven all over this country seeking new thrills, but recently I have found myself settled into a comfortable life lacking the same spontaneity of my previous self.

In an attempt to bring more adventure back into my life, I’m saying yes to more new opportunities. So last week I modeled for the local community college’s life drawing class. FULLY NUDE.

Obviously I was nervous. Would they harshly judge my expanding waistline and my blotchy skin?

I booked the gig over a month ahead and tried not to let my nerves build up in the time leading up to it. The day of the class I made sure I was all properly shaved and moisturized, wore loose-fitting clothes (no bra!), ate a very light breakfast, packed a water bottle, and headed to the Austin Community College Pinnacle Campus.

The classroom was on the 8th floor and two sides were sprawling windows that gave the most serene views of the southwest Austin greenbelt. The teacher, Janet Brooks, instantly put me at ease by explaining the process of the session while I filled out paperwork, like it was so completely normal. Then she set up my stage, in the center of the room, brightly lit, with a cushioned and draped box for my seated pose.

The stage offered the six students 360 degrees of viewing options, which they took advantage of for their work. Brooks set a timer and circled the room giving critique and guidance to each artist until the gentle alarm sounded and I was able to get up and stretch and see the progress of each piece. After a short break I would get back into the same pose as best I could and we’d repeat. We did this about five or six times until the class was over.

Can I just say that sitting completely still for seven to ten minutes is very difficult? Because it really is. Add to that the six strangers analyzing my entire form, and you have a recipe for odd and insecure thoughts. How splotchy is my skin today? Does this pose make my belly pudge out? Or make by boobs look lopsided? Oh God, that light is directly on my back fat! Deep breath. Keep looking at the same shadowy floor tile. Posture. Is my foot resting at the same angle as before? How much weight did I put on this arm last time? Why is that muscle clenched? Has it been tense this whole time? If I relax it now will that change my pose or the light? Shit. Try not to mess up their light. Breathe. Tile. Posture. My neck hurts. Maybe don’t turn my head so far if I get this gig again? Stomach, please don’t start growling. I should get lunch after this. I haven’t had sushi in a while. But do I have a sushi budget today? Tacos might be a better choice.

The students were using a method of toning their paper with charcoal and then lifting it with erasers to draw the form. I was so impressed with all the pieces that I asked if I could share them here. But I also want to keep my nudity off of this blog, so you can see all the images of the work from this class as a Patreon Freebie!

All in all, modeling for this class was such a great experience that I even booked a couple more dates. Many thanks go to Janet Brooks and her students!